Controversy Archive
controversy.adamzafir.com
Extremely serious opinions about extremely unserious things.
Restricted • Satire • Proceed at your own risk
You weren't supposed to find this.
Hot Takes That Don't Matter
Sealed Opinions
Case file #009SEALED
Every brainstorm eventually devolves into drawing boxes and arrows.
Case file #008LEAKED
If your app needs three onboarding screens, it actually needed zero.
Case file #007CLASSIFIED
The best UI is the one that lets me leave early.
Case file #006ARCHIVED
Group projects are just merge conflicts with feelings.
Random Take
The best productivity app is closing half your tabs.
LEAKED
Breaking Adam News Network
Urgent Bulletins
Bulletin #007Breaking
Investigation reveals 37 abandoned Figma frames
Lead analyst says: 'These were never meant to see daylight.'
Jan 26, 2026
Bulletin #006Breaking
Local dev swears 'this is the final refactor', archive disagrees
Version history shows 11 identical commits titled 'small fix'.
Jan 24, 2026
Bulletin #005Breaking
Adam creates new subdomain, scientists question his DNS habits
Analysts now tracking 14 unexplained domains orbiting adamzafir.com.
Jan 22, 2026
Bulletin #004Breaking
MRT escalator etiquette officially declared unsalvageable
Commuters report structural damage to their patience.
Jan 20, 2026